A Simple Guide for Behavior

1-5 “Don’t pick on people, jump on their failures, criticize their faults—unless, of course, you want the same treatment. That critical spirit has a way of boomeranging. It’s easy to see a smudge on your neighbor’s face and be oblivious to the ugly sneer on your own. Do you have the nerve to say, ‘Let me wash your face for you,’ when your own face is distorted by contempt? It’s this whole traveling road-show mentality all over again, playing a holier-than-thou part instead of just living your part. Wipe that ugly sneer off your own face, and you might be fit to offer a washcloth to your neighbor.

For centuries, we have missed the meaning and scope of this simple yet powerful passage. We have interpreted these verses to say, “If I judge other people, God is going to judge me.”
That is not what this passage says. It says that if we judge people, people will judge us.
We Get Back More than We Give
In Luke 6:38, we find the parallel passage to Matthew’s: “Give, and it shall be given unto you; good measure, pressed down,
and shaken together, and running over, shall men give into your bosom.” Traditionally this Scripture is applied only to financial giving. However, Jesus was not talking about finances in this verse. He was talking about what we give to others emotionally.
Earlier, in verses 36 and 37, He said, “Be ye therefore merciful, as your Father also is merciful. Judge not, and ye shall not be
judged: condemn not, and ye shall not be condemned: forgive, and ye shall be forgiven.” Verse 38 does not go on to say that God will heap these things on you; it says people will heap these things back on you.
Even though this verse could apply to financial generosity, it is more specifically talking about giving mercy, passing judgment, and expressing condemnation.What I give to others emotionally and relationally is what they give back to me.
Again, this is not talking about what God gives to me as a result of my actions. This is what people give to me. In other words, people respond to me in direct accordance with the way I treat them,
with one exception. When they give it back, they always give me more than I gave-“good measure, pressed down, and shaken together, and running over, shall men give into your bosom.”
If you give kindness and love, other people will give you kindness and love-“good measure, pressed down, and shaken together, and running over.”
However, if you give judgment
and criticism, others will give you judgment and criticism- “good measure, pressed down, and shaken together, and running over.”
Whatever you give, people will give back to you in a greater measure than you gave to them. Never confuse people’s
reaction with God’s reaction.
Life is somewhat like a garden. Actually, let’s consider our relationships to be the garden of our lives. Our garden grows with the seeds we plant. We all know that one seed, when planted, produces a harvest larger than itself. When we plant one, we reap many. One kernel of corn grows hundreds of kernels.
This is an indisputable law of life. Having said that, what is growing in your life’s garden? Too often we find our lives filled with things like criticism and rejection.
We wrongly assume that we had nothing to do with how others treated us, when the truth is, they usually gave back to us a harvest of how we treated them.
The Critical Factor: Judgment
The quality of our emotional life is found in the quality of our relationships. We are social, emotional, and relationship-
oriented beings.
We thrive on meaningful relationships. It is one of the deepest needs we have as human beings. And even though our judgments influence those relationships more than other factor, few people even know what it means to judge.
So, what does it mean to judge? Although judging has many facets, I believe we all can grasp the most basic and essential
aspect, which is this: Identifying what someone did is not judgment; that is merely observation.
It is when we assume to know why a person did what he did that we have entered into judgment.
Only God has the right to judge. He alone knows why people do what they do. We do not know, nor is it our place to judge
why. In many cases, people do not even know why they do what they do.
Jeremiah said, “The heart is…desperately wicked: who can know it?” (Jeremiah 17:9).
God is the only One who can truly know the heart. When people assume to know why, then their reactions are not based on reality; they are based on judgment.
That judgment causes confusion, pain, and loss.
Another short story and consequences of judgement – James and Samantha 
James  remember riding along in a car with two friends. One friend had some clothes hanging in the back of the car. James looked back and realized that Samantha’s clothes were blowing out the back window.
Now,  James had been working, and his hands were very dirty. So out of James desire to save Samantha’s clothes from ruin,  James shouted, “Quick, look back there!” Samantha didn’t look back. She just looked at James with a startled expression on her face.
Again James said in a loud, strong
voice, “Quick, look back there!” Samantha never realized James was
trying to help her salvage her clothes.
Instead, Samantha began to argue with James. “Who do you think you are, yelling at James like that?”
Samantha passed a judgment. Rather than hear James words, Samantha
assumed James motive. Samantha assumed that James was yelling because James was angry about something. While Samantha was arguing with James, her clothes blew out the window. Samantha’s reaction to James was the product of judgment
More importantly, what Samantha experienced emotionally also was the product of judgment. Samantha felt rejected. She felt insulted. She felt abused. All because she assumed to know why James was speaking to her
in a loud tone of voice. The truth was, James was attempting an act of kindness. The intensity in James voice was a reflection of the urgency of the situation. James meant it all for good, but Samantha experienced it as bad because of her judgment.
Through this simple illustration, you can see how so much conflict emerges in life. The moment you attempt to determine
why another is doing what he or she is doing, you have given it significance.
Keep in mind that nothing has the power to hurt you until you attach significance to it. Another person’s actions are only as significant to you as the judgments you pass on them.
The judgment you make is based on your decision about why that person did what he did. The degree of pain or insult you
experience from the actions of another is based solely on the judgment you pass.
And the judgment you pass is your assumption of why he did what he did.
Passing judgment causes us to react to situations inappropriately. The combination of our judgments and unacceptable behavior then begins the cycle of sowing and reaping.
People heap judgment back on us because of the judgment we have
sowed into their lives. Simply giving up the right to judge would break the cycle of pain and torment while salvaging many valuable relationships.
 P.S. – Question for you:
In reading and meditating on our post today, have you noticed similar patterns in your own relationship that you would want us to discuss with the hope of dealing with this negative patterns? Please let us know. We will be eager to help out! Info@otakada.org, both Whatsapp and sms numbers are +12407287276, and +2348032835348
This brings us to the end of episode 8 – True Stories: How to stop the pain – Pain is inevitable, but suffering is optional – What is Judgement? How does the effect of judgement play out in our relationships?  – True Stories – The effects of Ms. Busola’s judgment against her father, Mr Johnson and Samantha against James  next week,we bring you episode 9 – “Breaking the power of pain”
Until then, Shalom to you and your entire household..
Stay out of pain and suffering by Staying out of Judgement for judgement belongs to God!
Ambassador Monday Ogwuojo Oreojo Ogbe
Gods eagle ministries
Where we are seeding the Nations with Gods word and God is transforming lives through His timeless Truth. We are one in Christ Jesus, let’s stay One!